Save Our Dad: Mission Complete

Den laughing while watching Captain America for the first time

As some of you might remember, my family and I moved two years ago to care for my father-in-law, Den, who had cancer (read more about our mission to Save Our Dad).

A day at the movies with Grandpa Den

Den passed away peacefully in his sleep this morning. I am so grateful for the last 2 years we got to spend with him. He changed our lives as we changed his, and I discovered he truly was a kindred geeky spirit.

​For me, it took moving into the same house to truly get to know him. He really was amazing (and not just because he would always laugh at my terrible jokes). He was a hard worker and enjoyed being active. He was a caretaker to his wife for many years, a caretaker for his mother-in-law, and a sweetheart. He loved playing cribbage and pool, good food, classic comics and superheros, books, listening to music (we enjoyed many singalongs together!), and especially animals. He had a very kind heart. Den and I went to Rush Ranch often and loved being with the horses or quietly sitting and enjoying nature.

Our dog, Daisy, and Den shared a special bond

Getting The Phone Call this morning was a shock, even though he's been declining, just because he's always surprised us with his resilience. He regularly bounced back from things that should have killed him (lymphoma, strokes, pulmonary embolisms, and pneumonia--just to name a few). But he was a fighter.

Watching Black Panther with Grandpa Den

Toward the end, he told me to start taking better care of myself--to focus on my own health and my family. He said he understood that I couldn't be there for him as much as I wanted, and that was okay--even that he'd be angry if I was focusing on him too much. I think he also knew how hard we'd worked to keep him alive and how much it would hurt to let him go. 

Enjoying the horses and beauty of nature at Rush Ranch

So, feeling extremely guilty, I did what he told me. I visited less frequently, and he was right. The last few months have seen essential improvements for our family's wellbeing. It was also the time he needed to say his goodbyes and let go, himself.

Our cats, Dobby and Kylo, snuggling with Grandpa Den

It hurts, but I'm thankful he's not in pain anymore. Thankful he can breathe freely and deeply. That his body no longer holds back his unconquerable spirit, and he can be with the loved ones he'd lost.

Daisy and Den enjoying a day at Rush Ranch

Thank you to everyone who took this journey with us. We've had so much support, love, and prayers. We literally couldn't have made it through these years without them!