It's been a very hard year for us, full of trials and challenges. Then, Grandpa Den (my father-in-law who we saved from cancer two years ago) passed away right after Thanksgiving.
Those first few weeks were very tender, and depression hit my husband and I like a bus. It was hard to make Christmas very cheerful. I just didn't have the will to decorate or for the holiday traditions we usual enjoy. The kids put up the tree themselves. It was sparsely decorated and pitiful—just like us. We put on the best show we could, but our hearts weren't there.
Then, an idea hit me. I should say, it bit me like an annoying little bug and wouldn't go away. It nagged at me until it was all I could think about. I thought it was a crazy idea, and it probably was, but I knew I had to try it.
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I had to do something, or I wouldn't survive this. Music has always been a wonderful part of my life. My mom used to always go around singing. We used to tease her about it, but I always wanted to be able to sing like her. As a kid, I practiced and sang when I was alone. I tried to sound just like Ariel from The Little Mermaid. I memorized song after song, hymns from church, and musicals like Les Misérables.
Music always helps my depression. Give me a a good beat or something I can sing to, and the world suddenly changes. It doesn't usually make depression go away completely, but it helps my brain switch tracks and makes my mood better. The haze of depression fades a bit, and I start to see things in color again. Especially when I can sing!
It helps me get moving when I'm sluggish, feel like cleaning when I want to sleep, etc. I sang to my babies (we had some really rough patches where I'd end up singing lullabies for hours on end!) I used to sing to the feral cats I tamed, into the wind when I walked to school... It was a daily thing, but somehow, I'd lost that. Music and singing motivate me like nothing else, but I usually forget all about it!
So, I wondered...Could sharing my love of music, not only remind me to sing, but help others too? And, this is what I came up with. I practiced once via Skype with my sister. (Even that left me super panicked, even though she was great.) Finally, I went live on Facebook, completely terrified of being rejected, made fun of, and making a fool of myself. Without makeup etc. because I didn't want to put on a show. I wanted people to see things as they really were, so I came as I was.
Singing Away Depression (The 1st Video)
The response was more than I'd hoped for. Everyone was so supportive, not one bad thing was said.
Not one word of criticism. Not even about how I cried like a baby or could barely even talk for the first like five minutes, let alone sing on key!
So, I guess I'll try to make this a regular series. Let's do this thing. Let's sing away depression! ![]()
1 Comment
8/29/2019 07:19:55 am
I am not sure about others but I think there really is no way of getting out of this when you are inside one. You just need to survive it like a self limiting virus. You need to keep yourself physically strong enough to remain intact all throughout the process. You will wake up one day without realizing it's gone. You just might have a relapse upon the discovery that a lot of who you are had been destroyed in the process so next time you see someone having problems, just go check if they have eaten already and make sure they sleep on time.
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SHOP WITH ME ON AMAZONAbout MeI'm a single mom with 3 special needs children, living in Utah, overcoming mental illness and crazy health problems to pull my family out of poverty and live my dreams as an author.
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Medical information is based on my own beliefs and experience. Nothing on this site should be used instead of professional medical advice. Archives
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